


The Butler - Between Afternoon Tea

by Marshmalloween



Series: The Pandora and It's Cup Bearer [2]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Light Angst, Other, Patient Bucky Barnes, Tea Parties, Therapy, kind of
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-12
Updated: 2020-08-12
Packaged: 2021-03-06 01:14:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,839
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25854976
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Marshmalloween/pseuds/Marshmalloween
Summary: Bucky wanted to help someone, but how can he help her if Bucky himself doesn’t ask for a help first?
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes & Original Male Character(s)
Series: The Pandora and It's Cup Bearer [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1876141
Kudos: 1





	The Butler - Between Afternoon Tea

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Thorfanficwriter](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Thorfanficwriter/gifts).



> This late submission for @thorfanficwriter 500 Follower Challange. The prompt I choose is I wonder if it was a dream. Happened right after The Lady and The Butler

Bucky stood in front of one of the doors in the medical wing. The dark-colored door has a stark line of glass and metal, accentuating the unique minimalist character. So Tony, Bucky thought. With a loud sigh, Bucky knocks on the door carefully, afraid that his metal hand will make a dent on the door’s surface. 

A small “Come on in.” can be heard, so Bucky carefully opens the door.

“Sergeant Barnes, it’s nice to see you today.” Bucky nodded and sat on one of the armchairs in the room. The feather-like softness of the velvet seating loosening the hard muscle in his body a little bit. 

“Doc,” Bucky replies with a flat tone, suddenly aware why he is here. 

“You can call me Chris, remember?” Bucky nods.

After Shuri wiped the trigger words, Bucky still finds it hard to forget his past, yet his time spent in the comfort of Wakanda’s nature, at some point, helped him the most. 

Not long, however, after Steve visited him and asked him to join the Avengers, have things slightly changed. Not only the nightmares, but Bucky also has a hard time interacting with most of the people living in the tower. By actively joining the team, Bucky somehow wants to find a way to pay for his wrongs in the past by doing something right. However, most of the time, it doesn’t go as smooth as he wants it to. With a lot of persuasion and Steve’s pleading eyes, Bucky agrees to get help and to go meet a therapist. 

At first, Bucky always found a way to break from his schedule, but one time he finally had it really bad, and he just barged into the session room, brooding for an hour. 

The therapist or Chris stood up from his office chair, joining Bucky to sit opposite him. Chris looks like Bruce, not physically but more in the way he dresses for his work as a ‘doctor.’ However, he always reminds Bucky of Steve in so many ways.

“I heard from Captain Rogers that you just arrived from a mission?” Chris says, crossing his legs and getting comfortable.

Bucky nodded. Eyes looking into the distance, past Chris to the glass wall behind him. 

“How was the mission?” Chris asks.

Bucky averts his eyes and briefly meets Chris’ baby blue ones. “Uhh…the mission went fine. We…we handled it pretty quickly.” 

Bucky didn’t say anything after that. The silence engulfing the room, mostly cast in white, metal, and green. Several plants that were situated in the large room give it a homey vibe, things that Bucky finds tolerable. He didn’t know how long they sat in silence. 

Sometimes, Chris would do the talking, trying to engage Bucky, asking about his day, how he takes care of his terrarium, or about his dog, Swax. One thing Bucky is thankful for after his first visit is that neither the physiatrist or Chris has an analog clock. The sound of the ticking clock is unbearable for him sometimes.

“Sergeant Barnes,” Chris says, “Perhaps you wanted to tell me something?” 

“I…I…” Bucky’s mouth suddenly snapped shut. He could not even open up about himself, how could he discuss things about other people?

“Maybe you just need a little more time. We don’t need to hurry.” Chris said, patiently. “If you aren’t on a mission, we can meet at the same time next week.” 

Bucky let out a sigh and smile, although it looks more like his mouth is set in a hard line. Bucky excuses himself and exits the office. Maybe I should visit her again, he thought as he left the medical wing.

The visits to the therapist are occurring regularly. Although it mostly ends up with Bucky talking about his mission in five minutes while the rest of the time, they just drink tea. Chris is very patient, indulging Bucky and asking how his day is or if there is anything interesting happening lately. 

”I…I have been having a flashback.” Bucky says. 

Chris stop mid-sip of his tea. It isn’t everyday Bucky opens up about his flashbacks. Because of the conversations, they have usually revolved around the present-day happenings. Chris quietly puts his cup back on the porcelain saucer. Chris can see how nervous Bucky is from the way he slightly slumps his shoulders and shifts his eyes to look past his shoulder. 

”I know I did some awful things in the past. That vicious feeling will always haunt me.” 

”But you are deciding to do good now Sergeant Barnes, and to help the world.” Chris cut in politely.

Bucky gives Chris a bitter laugh. ”If it weren’t for Steve, I might never have been ready to redeem myself.”

”Captain Rogers is a good and supportive friend. I am glad that both of you found each other again.” Chris says, smiling. 

”But I think going back in the field isn’t the best option.” 

Chris silent for a moment, contemplating his next words. ”Why do you think like this?” 

“Although the flashbacks from my time as the winter soldier keep haunting me, I’m always worried that something bad will happen during a mission, that I will cause a problem.” 

”We can’t control everything. Don’t blame yourself for everything, Sergeant.” That was the last sentence Chris says to Bucky before he ends the session.

***

Bucky impatiently knocks on the door and opens it after Chris replies, “come in,” from the office. Today, Bucky decides that he should talk about the nightmare he has been having these past couple of weeks. 

Chris welcomes Bucky with a warm smile while he is watering his plants. Bucky awkwardly sits on the armchairs he usually sits on most of the time he is here. “Good morning, Sergeant.” There is no accusation in his tone. Chris slowly turns the kettle on to prepare some tea, something he likes to do while doing his job as one of the therapists for the Avengers. “Would you like some tea?” Bucky nods as Chris eyes the variety of tea he has in his small wall cabinet. “Any tea in mind, Sergeant?” while he put an Irish breakfast tea bag in his own porcelain cup. 

“Chamomile is okay.” 

“Chamomile it is,” Chris replies when he puts that particular tea bag in Bucky’s cup. He can see that the super-soldier has tired eyes, body stiff with his arms crossed. At the same time, the fingers of his metal arm are clenching and unclenching rapidly. A very distinctive and uncomfortable body language is what he observes from Bucky. Chris puts the tea, milk, and sugar on the table. Chris chooses the beautiful porcelain pastel blue tea set today. The cup has a floral design on two sides with a little touch of gold. He finds the super soldiers somewhat distracted by his choice of cup.

“You have a lot of teacups.” Bucky blurts out, louder than intended. 

Chris chuckles a little bit while adding a cube of sugar and a little bit of milk to his tea. “My wife Scarlett is a tea drinker. She basically converted me from coffee to tea.” Stirring his tea quietly and sipping it a little bit, he adds, “she has a lot of porcelain tea sets. That’s basically what my salary is for.” Bucky smiles at Chris’ joke, although it does not entirely reach his eyes, but Chris can see his posture has relaxed somewhat. 

“I bet it’s fun, living normally. Having a wife, kids, and a dog.” Bucky gives a half-smile while he, too, sips his tea.

“Is that the life you’re craving, Sergeant?” Chris asks.

“Yeah, pretty much. That’s what I thought I would have back in the ’40s,” Bucky answers, sadness clouding his features. “But…but that’s not important right now.” Bucky continues as he inhales deeply.

“My nightmares have been really bothering me these past couple of weeks.” Chris listens carefully and encourages Bucky to continue with his story. 

“In my dream, I let this woman cry helplessly while she is being…” Bucky gulps, “being beaten and…and forced to do things she doesn’t want to,” he says, a tear running down his cheeks. 

Bucky concentrates on his breathing like Chris always suggests when he is having a hard time talking. He tries to focus on it, slowly and calmly, until he regains control again. “Every time I wake up, I wonder if it was a dream or a reality that won’t leave my head.” 

Chris looks at Bucky sympathetically. “I am sorry that you are constantly having this nightmare, Sergeant.” 

Bucky pauses. “It’s actually happened recently. It’s not …it’s not completely like my dream, but…it’s close.” 

For the first time in all of his sessions with Chris, Bucky spends 40 minutes talking about his nightmares. He verbalizes every detail he can remember that consistently appear in his dream. How that in his dream, he can only watch it happen while the woman, again and again, calls out for him to save her. 

Chris patiently waits until Bucky pours out everything. He thinks he might have an idea that this nightmare is related to an agent he knew. “When you said it’s actually happened recently, have you had a chance to meet with the person in your dream?” Bucky nods at Chris.

“She…we…talked one time. I didn’t see anything out of place before. That day…that day we talked normally.” Bucky pauses. Bucky indulges Chris in what actually happened during the mission. He doesn’t say for sure if the woman was an agent or regular civilian, but Bucky has an idea that Chris might know who the person is. 

“And after that? Have you heard anything from her?” Chris asks, and Bucky just shakes his head. 

Chris nods, “have you…talked to someone close to her? Like her family or her friends?” 

Bucky frowns, “as far as I know, she doesn’t have a family. I have talked to people that are close to her, but they said she has been hiding in her room these past 2 weeks.”

Chris’s face softened at the sight of Bucky in front of him. “You really care for her, don’t you, Sarge?” It comes out as more of a statement than a question.

Bucky let out a nervous laugh, “I…I don’t think I am capable of that.” 

“Sergeant,-“ Chris says in a stern yet sincere voice, “-don’t let your past prevent you from caring and having feelings towards others. It might be a help on this journey.” He smiles. “A supportive environment is what both of you need right now.”

Bucky hesitates for a second. “What…what should I do?” 

“Talk to her. If she doesn’t send you away, that’s where we start.” Chris gives Bucky a proud smile and pats him on the shoulder.

Bucky takes a sharp intake of air. He feels like he has a new purpose, that he, after all, is not just a cold-blooded assassin. He nods as a small smile plays on his lips, “thank you, Chris.”

**Author's Note:**

> Comment and kudos def really appreciated, I want to know what you thought about this xoxo.  
> \---  
> I am @Chuuulip at Tumblr ;)


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